Jul. 4th, 2008

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I was on IRC this morning with a bathypelagic fish who was very unhappy. He had followed the glowing lure of an anglerfish's tongue and almost got eaten.

"It's not the danger," he told me. "I mean, of course I don't like almost getting eaten, but I'm a tiny fish. I get used to that. It's just, well, there's no justice in it. All the other deep sea creatures are interesting and exotic. They have glowing tongue, or weird spines, or they're alien and enormous, or luminous and full of venom, or a furry albino lobster-thing. And here I am, bottom of the food chain, and the worst part is, I'm not exotic at all! I'm just a tiny fish! You'd think, it's hard enough being at risk of being eaten, I could at least be translucent or spiny or glowy or creepy or something, but no. I'm predated and jejune. It sucks!"

Cheer up, little guy! At least we have the Internet.

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