(no subject)

A list of things that it is very hard to convince a shark to do.

• It is very difficult to convince a shark to sit through a performance review, even if the shark could get a large increase of salary from it.
  
• A shark won't tell you honestly whether it likes your poems or not.
  
• Sharks are very hesitant to wear formal attire.
  
• You will have a hard time getting a shark to reconstruct Special Relativity, using the lightbulb-on-a-train scenario and the Pythagorean theorm.
  
• You can't get a shark to watch your hamburger and make sure no one steals it.
  
• Sharks rarely are willing to reminisce with you, or tell you how their day was.
  
• Everyone likes vacations, but you can't get a shark to make concrete plans to travel with you.
  
• Nobody has ever convinced a shark to become their jogging or workout buddy. Not once.
  
• Even if everyone votes in agreement, a shark won't wait for a complete action plan before moving forward.
  
• If you want to do a mix-tape swap, don't ask a shark.
  
• You may be able to convince a shark to go to the art museum with you, but it won't be easy.
  
• Don't even bother trying to get a shark to start an online crafts business with you. A shark will flake every time.
  
• Oddly, you can't even get a shark to play a game of pool with you.
  
• You will have difficulty convincing a shark to use language or comprehend the entire process of "convincing."