Trouble

Whenever I feel a sense of confusion or doubt, I open a trouble ticket with my company helpdesk.

"I'm not sure if I'm a teepee or a wigwam," I told the helpdesk technician.

"Oh, that's simple," said the technician, "I'll just set you to be a teepee."

And then he updated my LDAP entry and I stopped being human.

Trouble, Part II

I went travelling this afternoon, meeting various mayors.

"In our town," said one mayor, "the barber shaves every man who doesn't shave himself. We have a problem that we have to keep hiring new barbers because every barber disappears in logical paradox by the morning."

"This," I said, "is yet another problem that can be solved by feminism."