(no subject)

"We'd like to do business with you," the man said, "but our legal department is insisting that you sign this contract. You're swearing that you'll reveal to us, in a timely fashion, all northwest Indian flat bread that you consume while this contract is in effect. If you withhold this information, you'll be liable for any damages incurred."

I groaned in dismay at the idea, but I signed the contract anyway.